May 31, 2004

From Russia With Loathe...

OK, it's a bit melodramatic of a title, but the past month has been...interesting. I'm a single guy, and decided to put my dating life "on hold" (meaning, pickin's are slim). That's when my Russian cutie came in.

(Please note - this note contains heavy sarcasm throughout, and should be seen in that light).

She e-mailed me, and sent me a picture - not a bad lookin' woman. Of course, since my bull$h!+ detector is now on overload (and since I could always use a pen pal), I decided to be Mr. Cool and Distant via e-mail.

Of course, three weeks later, the bombshell - she's madly in love with me. Go figure. She even sends me a picture of "herself" in a bikini and says that she has had "sexual dreams" about me. Wondering what in the name of Buddha on a pogo stick is going on, I decided to do some investigating.

Looking through the pictures she had sent, they were all of two to three different women. (I guess she was hoping that the testosterone would flood to my brain and blind me). Thanks to a computer-savvy pal, we figured out that, for a Russian gal, her e-mails all orginated in the US...and that her domain didn't exist. Of course, searching on Google led to an industry of Russian women available...and that I was a soon-to-be victim of a scam.

Of course, my Russian "hottie" has now sent me an e-mail asking for $2400 to purchase the plane ticket, and that she now has a visa, a picture of which she sent to me. (Trying to get a tourist/business visa in Russia is like trying to locate a funny show starring McLean Stevenson that isn't M.A.S.H.) I told her that, in the next few weeks, I would be visiting her.

Watch this space for updates!

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