More Identity Crisis Speculation (satire)

OK, I know I've done this before, but after issue 5....actually, this is more of a comment than speculation.
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So Captain Boomerang's son has super-speed, huh? This can either go one of several ways:

1. The Captain and Iris West had a fling, and resulting pregnancy;
2. The Captain had a passionate affair with Joan Garrick;
3. Boomerang Jr. loved playing with chemicals in thunderstorms;
4. Boomerang Jr. is Wally West's Long-Lost Twin Brother; or
5. Barry Allen fooled around with Boomerang's sister.

Gee, kids, ain't comics fun?